As I sit here writing this, there are a lot of things about self-employment that still don’t feel real after 4 months. Probably because for most of my life I was too terrified to take this risk. I sat at a desk because I was afraid of what might happen if I left. Afraid of working in a dark, seedy bar that required I stay late to clean up after the doors close. Afraid of odd jobs and off-brand toilet paper. Of worrying about whether my electric was going to get shut off. Of living the starving artist lifestyle if that’s what it took.

I reasoned that I needed to earn more if I wanted to spend more and that seemed paramount after I had spent years struggling to support myself through college. At one point I had 3 different jobs while I was enrolled which I think must’ve helped me to learn a thing or two about adversity but also taught me to be fearful of money, or rather a lack thereof. So I stayed close to what I knew was safe and could protect me.

Until I blinked and years had flown by and I was not much closer to living the life of creativity that I had always wanted. My PTSD from being a broke college student had kept me fearful and complacent for too long. But if I wasn’t going to try now, then when?

The topic of timing has drifted into my thoughts and conversations many times in the past few months. When I broke the news, it was a blessing that so many people shared that they were shocked it had taken me as long as it did to jump instead of instant fear for my fate. But with my corporate career in the rear-view mirror and some time to reflect, I’m not sure the “right time” to quit actually exists.

Sure, there are days that I wonder what things would be like if I had taken the leap sooner. Many of my classmates moved to New York or LA or Chicago right after college to pursue their dreams of fame and success; what would have happened if I joined them? Maybe I would be performing full-time. Living in Las Vegas and working as a show girl. Or know how to play a ukulele. Maybe I would have never picked up a camera, but maybe I would have. Maybe the sky would’ve opened up and dropped one in my lap in a similar way, right when I needed it most.

But after day dreaming, I always end with appreciation for my journey. There are so many lessons I learned from my day job in corporate finance from navigating a professional business setting to sharpening my accounting skills. Who are we kidding? Forming accounting skills to begin with. I caution anyone side hustling from negating the lessons they are currently being taught in their day jobs that will help catapult them forward in their own careers. The lessons you are learning are really immeasurable.

I’ve talked to other friends who are freelancers, some who’ve been doing it for most of their adult lives but who look exactly like me in terms of age and zest for life. It has become clear that while some learn to swim by throwing themselves into the water and hoping they float, others will learn from podcasts and seminars before stepping a toe in. They say the hardest part is jumping and that has proven to be true in almost every sense. But once you’re swimming, baby, you’re really swimming!

So how do you know if it’s time to make the leap?

In short, do it when it makes sense in your journey. There is no timeline for success, no deadline on joy. You do not need to apologize for the set of paths that have led to the one you currently walk because everyone’s is winding. The most important advice I could give? Do not wait on anyone’s permission to manifest your dreams because you will be waiting all your life.

I quit when my time was being divided and sliced into so many slivers that it became exhausting to keep going. When my performance reviews at the office went from “Exceeds Expectations” to “Meets Expectations,” and no one was being served correctly. Not my clients. Not my day job. Least of all myself.

When it made just enough sense financially. That’s a bold thing to say on the internet I suppose but I don’t regret it. I don’t suggest jumping without a plan for paying the bills but there’s a certain amount of unknown that is simply put, part of the job. At some point my happiness was more important than my checklist and I decided, you know what, Emily? It’s time to start believing in yourself.

For better or worse (I would argue, better), here I am 4 months later.

Are you a full-time creative or side-hustling with that ultimate goal? I’d love to hear about your journey. Comment below!

Xoxo,

PS. All the photography for this blog post was done by Wild Leaf Films based in St. Louis, Missouri. Check out more of their work here!

Why the "right time" to quit your day job doesn't exist.

Emily Johnson, llc

Powered by Squarespace